Star Gazer

Star Gazer

Do you like to paddle in the splashy shore all barefoot and carefree? Paddle deeper, deeeeeeeper. Significantly deeper. Oh dear, don't look down but that there, no DON'T LOOK. Oh phew, it's not a zombie's face, it's just a....no, whatever it is I'm still screaming. Stargazer (his parents reinvented themselves as hippies after his dad had a breakdown) is not handsome. I'd like to say he has a lovely personality, but it would be a dirty lie. He hides under the sand showing as little of his terrorface as possible, until he can launch upwards and eat the face/genitals off you. The Stargazer fish has unusually sibilant speech, and is prone to drooling. He pops to the loo with his phone during pub quizzes, puts his feet up on seats on buses, and won't move his bags to let you sit down on trains. Over-uses the word 'eclectic'. Bit starey.