Blobfish

Blobfish

Poor Blobfish. Bobbing around the sea depths, minding his own business, looking pretty fly. BAM - brought to the surface, depressurises and looks like that blind date you got set up with last Summer. Having a gloopy, gelatinous body (don't do that face at me, all these lock downs have been HARD) and a density slightly higher than water, the blobfish bobs about, eating whatever is in front of its face (I SAID DON'T JUDGE ME). That said, he's not an idea partner; smelling faintly of cardboard that's been put on a bonfire, then put out with water, he's prone to clearing his throat in an annoying, repetitive matter (cough already), and chuckling to himself whilst shaing his head, desperate to share an anecdote with you that is woefully overlong and with no apparent end, or indeed point. Don't make eye contact! I said, oh never mind...